Perception: The only thing that matters in politics

“Show me the man and I’ll show you the rule” – the statement is common parlance in bureaucracy, but this formalism is all the more visible in politics. Logic, allegiance, ideology, principles do not matter. The only thing that is important is perception.

This is precisely the reason why no politician wants to be seen as to be opposing the creation of the Lokpal lest he be perceived to be corrupt, even though it is no secret that covertly they are all working, or at least praying, for it to be a stillborn. The BJP is trying to project itself as the only party which is fighting inside the Parliament for a strong and independent Lokpal while covertly it is making a mockery of the report of the Lokayukta in Karnataka which had indicted the former Chief Minister. Committees after committees are being set up to investigate cases made by the Lokayukta even when the Karnataka Lokayukta has an independent investigation wing which had done its investigation in the matter. At the same time the BJP is playing its caste cards right by keeping Yedurappa close and now in UP, by inducting the tainted Khushwaha, who was expelled from BSP on corruption charges, and projecting him as a backward caste hero of sorts. It’s political double speak is also obvious from the fact that on the one hand it does not allow Parliament to function – the entire winter session was washed away in 2010 – and on the other, it approaches the President to call a special session of the Parliament on Lokpal.

The UPA is trying to project that it introduced a strong Lokpal Bill after wide consultations. While the introduction of the Bill itself could be under public pressure, the consultations have been nothing more than theatrics. The only ones really consulted seem to be the gallery of multitude of lawyers. If the bill in its present form is strong, then we must notify the publishers of the Oxford English Dictionary that the word strong has a new meaning.

In election rallies and otherwise it is common for Rahul Gandhi and other Congress Leaders to say that Congress Party and Dr. Manmohan Singh sends crores of rupees to the states giving the perception that the UPA government is doing a favour to the states by giving them what is rightfully and constitutionally theirs. It is not the ancestral money of the Gandhi’s or for that matter of Dr. Singh.

The Congress Party is also trying to project itself as the champion of the religious minorities before the UP elections by talking about 4.5% reservation within the OBC quota and also indicating that it may be increased to 6%, while the Samajwadi Party is opposing it hoping that the minorities forgive him for his association with Kalyan Singh during the last elections and support him in anticipation that he would deliver on his promise of reservation for minorities proportional to their population.

The BSP has declared its support for a strong Lokpal and Chief Minister Mayawati has removed almost 70% of her ministers on charges of corruption, thus projecting herself as a champion of sorts of the anti-corruption drive. But it is doubtful if this delayed action when her government has almost run its course would cut much ice with the people of the state. The question is what she was doing for the past four and a half years. Was she unaware and hence incapable to govern, did she look the other way and choose to be oblivious of the facts while her corrupt ministers looted the state and misused their powers or was she hand in glove with them and now has engaged in theatrics to garner public support? The case is open and the people of the state will pronounce their verdict when election results come in March.

Mamta’s political compulsions do not allow her to exit from the UPA government, but she cannot be perceived toing the UPA line when it comes to matters she has strong opinions about. At the same time, even though the government is getting blackmailed by a very small partner in terms of numbers at every nook and corner, it cannot be seen as yielding ground to a smaller party and hence the bickering of the two parties in West Bengal.

The divide between perception and reality of upholding democratic traditions and principles is obvious from the fact how parties have to issue whips even for discussions on issues relating to ideals and principles. Inner party democracy is a farce or else why would party members be thrown out for only speaking adversely about what their leaders or their heirs say think or do.

In a world where perception becomes the end, why would any party endure the tough job of action? One only hopes that during the coming elections, the electorate proves otherwise and tears through the farce and double speak.

The Fight to the Finish: Political Elites versus the Civil Society

Modern India has a new caste system. Today’s Brahmins are the officialdom, the bureaucrats, the civil administrators who interpret not the Vedas or Shastras but our laws and regulations. They determine what the ritual is.  The 40 years of socialistic pattern of society have turned what was a clean and good administration at independence into commissars and controllers. They do not serve, they administer.

Today’s Kshatriyas are the politicians. Their concern is with enhancing their power, their wealth, and their control over means of production and over the populace. They look upon themselves not as elected representatives, leave alone as servants of people but as feudal rulers.

Today’s Vaisyas are the businessmen, the professionals, the traders. They have tasted the elixir of free economy, of globalized culture of business and professionals, but are not averse also to take advantage of the inherent limitations and contradictions in our society and in our economy.


Finally, today’s Shudras are the public at large. And like always, the new Brahmins, Kshatriyas or Vaisyas do not give a damn for the new Shudras. This new caste system is wholly different from the earlier one. But it is equally vicious.

The ethic of public service, the inspiration for the betterment of society, the commitment to give more than one receives is increasingly seen to be absent among the power elites. We are said to be a democracy. Nanaji Deshmukh had observed that we do not actually have a democracy, we only have elections. Elections are not to be mistaken for democracy. Democracy is the government of the people, by the people, for the people. We have government of the powerful, by the powerful, for the powerful.

Anna’s struggle for Lokpal should be seen on this background. It is not simply a fight to choose either the Jan Lokpal or the government draft for Lokpal. It is a fight for civil society demanding unprecedented accountability from the power elites of India who are refusing to accept this accountability. A full change in the governance culture is actually what is demanded by the activists (and now by the people on the streets), and is being side-tracked by the power elites. What should be a constructive and trustful dialogue has degenerated into a suicidal conflict.


It is hard not to draw parallels with the Arab revolution or with the events in Europe in 1848. In 1848, revolutionary fervor broke across continental Europe. The waves of revolution were set in motion in France and, like a domino effect, countries after country were hit by revolts. The bases of European revolts were the same as those in the modern-day Arab world. Economic disparity, abuse of power, and a lack of political equality were all causes for the wave of revolutions in 1848 Europe. Industrialization and economic and technological leaps were causing major socio-economic changes in European societies before and up to 1848. While in a very different historical context, this has also been occurring in today’s Arab world. In 19^th century Europe, fundamental economic changes, characterized by the consolidation of wealth, caused massive unemployment as well as the outbreak of famines. This has also occurred in recent years in the Arab world, largely as a result of the brunt of neoliberal reforms and rising food prices. Anger over lack of employment, lack of opportunities, corrupt government practices and rising food prices were the core reasons behind the Arab revolution.


Some say that India is no Egypt, but the similarities are difficult to miss. The demographic dividend that all are gung ho about could be the source of disgruntled youth if the country fails to provide them with requisite opportunities. The “policy paralysis” in government, animosity in the polity, decelerating economy, rampant corruption in all walks of life are all signals that the worst fears could become true sooner than later. Amidst all this, Anna’s movement is providing an outlet for the common people to vent their frustrations.


It is absurd when some politicians ask who has given Anna the mandate to ask for a Lokpal. Is it not obvious from the following he had during the August agitation? Who had given him the mandate to turn his village of Ralegaon Siddhi? He did what is expected of an elected government. One only has to follow the mandate of one’s conscience. People’s approval shall follow. Then there are those who say that the Parliament is supreme. Yes, the Parliament is supreme, Parliamentarians are not. Government is supreme; the people who govern are not. Those in Parliament cannot legislate for their own protection or aggrandizement, nor can those in government act in their own interest as they hold office in a fiduciary capacity. Legislation is the sole prerogative of the Parliament but if the Parliamentarians cannot deliver what the people demand, they better make way for others who can. The argument that nobody can dictate to the Parliament is a fallacious argument.


The British left India and the Maharajas gave up their kingdoms not because they suddenly became kind hearted but because the system, the culture, the society in which they flourished changed to make them irrelevant. Today’s India has changed beyond recognition. The aware and empowered people cannot be taken for granted. Today people want day to democracy, not a once in five years occurrence. It is about time the political class saw the writing on the wall and understood people’s aspirations.


‘We the people’ have given our country the Constitution. The Parliament, the President, the Judiciary, the Prime Minister, indeed the full Government are mere creatures of the Constitution. The people are supreme.

The dictate of the people, as articulated by Anna, is an earnest message to the parliamentarians – “Expose yourself to the demand for accountability, or else….” Everything else is mere detail.

I am peeved

I admit it is a weird title to return to blogging after almost 3 years. However, it is the state of affairs that must be blamed for this.

I am peeved because the so called preachers and protectors of democracy are not listening to peoples' voices. 'Occupy' protesters are being evacuated forcefully, while nothing is being done to support those in Egypt who are fighting for a genuine democracy.

I am peeved because NATO and US continue to consider the world their own backyard. They bomb a Pakistani check post, kill Pakistani soldiers and simply say sorry. And, amid all this my government wants MFN status from Pakistan but is sheepishly watching all this rather than stand by Pakistan's side on this.

I am peeved because the government here is in a mess. In fact there is no governance, only administration. You ask any question and the government answers that they have a legislation on the issue in the waiting. What else could one expect from the government that is perennially in survival mode?

I am peeved because the Parliamentarians, who pleaded the citizens to uphold the supremacy of the Parliament when Anna Hazare was agitating, do not let the Parliament function. Where else can people throw tantrums and chairs in their office and get the day off as a reward?

I am peeved because it is so easy for the opposition to hold the government to ransom, despite it not having the numbers. Parliament has become an arena for blackmail where the opposition tell the government that it's the opposition's way or the highway. However, ironically, the opposition is playing straight into the hands of the government by not allowing the Parliament to function. The Question Hour is probably the most potent tool in the hands of the Opposition to hold the Government accountable. However, it only suits the government if there are no debates on crucial issues in the House. I am peeved because it is public money - yours and mine - that is going down the drain due to a non-functioning Parliament. It had cost us roughly Rs230 Crores when the winter session last year was wasted and we are losing Rs 4 crores daily this time around.

I am peeved because traditionally non-partisan instruments of the Parliament like the PAC and the JPC and standing committees have also become places to demonstrate political one-upmanship. I am peeved because constitutional authorities like the CAG are being deliberately maligned by people who have absolutely no credit to their names other that being 'orderlies' of the people in power.

I am peeved because my household budget is going completely haywire because of the inflation, the countries current account deficit is worsening because of the falling rupee and the RBI and Finance Ministry are mere spectators. True they did a fantastic job during the recession in 2008, but how long can we harp on the past? What about today?

I am peeved because the Planning Commision has become non-consequential. It is setting absurd poverty lines. Tendulkar Committee did well to change the poverty estimates simply from calorie consumption to including several other necessities. However, the Planning Commission is undoing the good by setting an arbitrary poverty line, which defies all common sense. No one in his right mind would believe that Rs32 is sufficient for a person for a day to survive in a city. One must remember that out of this Rs32, Rs18 are for food items and Rs14 for rent, transportation, education, health, clothing and footwear. The Planning Commission sets target for power generation and not even 50% of it is achieved. Besides, it slept all the while the coal availability in the country dropped and has woken up now when the reserves are well below critical levels and the country faces a severe power crisis.

I am peeved because the Government and Opposition confuse me on several key policy issues. While the government says that FDI in retail will create more jobs and the opposition insists it will lead to job losses, since most of the retailers are in the unorganised sector, no one is sure which way the balance will tilt. Besides, since when has logic become important in politics. Only thing that matters is to foment public opinion. No wonder then the media is becoming the Parliament of the general public.

I am peeved because the media has become a circus. Sachin's hundredth international century is being made into a national obsession rather than a mere statistic. What difference will it make to the greatness of the man if, God forbid, he does not achieve it? In the era of 24hr news channels, anything and everything is becoming news. I am sure Sachin's next ton is right around the corner, so please let him be.

I am peeved because even after 3 years of the 26/11 attacks little has changed and little has been done to enhance our security, while when a politicians house is robbed in Delhi, the police are able to bring every single item back within a few days.

I am peeved because the corporates can write letters directly to the PM to agree to their terms 'or else' (reference to the letter written by Chairmen of Vodafone, Airtel and Idea to the PM), but the common man has no respite for 5 years from a government he chose with the right intent but which got entangled in its own mess.

I am peeved because when one Maoist is killed, people start crying about his human rights, but when 76 CRPF men were killed in Gadchiroli, those very people didn't shed a tear. Why should they? After all, the CRPF men had enrolled to die!

I am peeved because the marking and grading system in schools have been changed but the pedagogy remains the same. Teachers cannot fail students anymore but continue to teach the way they did. Will this lead to better students?

I cannot stress more on how Nehru's promise of wiping every tear from every eye is being broken and how Tagore's dream of an India where the mind is without fear and the head is held high is being shattered.

Au Revoir

"It pains - it truly pains - to give words to your feelings at junctures such as these..." was how my speech started at my college farewell. But I am not going to tread that path again. It is only going to be all smiles this time around - no tears. In case you are wondering who I am writing this for, it is for my dear friend Varun.

Varun and I had joined Tech Mahindra Ltd. (then called Mahindra British Telecom Ltd.) on the same day; infact we were in the same batch for training with 28 others and since then we have been together in the project (he had started in a separate project briefly), stayed in the same building first and then in the same house. By this you would have had a fair idea of how much we have shared and cared for each other.

I was very apprehensive leaving for Mumbai all alone, leaving back my friends and family. What else would you expect from a boy fresh out of college moving to Mumbai - a city where God knows how many people like me get lost each day. On top of that, I had no friend or relative in Mumbai. However, it was the same feeling that I had gone through when I had first left home for Bokaro, then Varanasi and then Kolkata. God had been very gracious and I had been very lucky to have made very close friends wherever I went. They always took care of me and I have always cherished their friendship. And I came to Mumbai with the same hope of making some good friends here too - and God was very kind again, for I met Varun and Bhavin. I would not write much about Bhavin as this one is dedicated to Varun. Still, Bhavin or 'chacha' as we fondly call him is a Mumbaiya Gujju. For those who understand what that means, I do not need to explain anything else, and those of you who do not know, try finding out what it means. One thing that I adore him for is his straight talk and practicality. The fact that he can cope up with my tantrums is his biggest USP.

Coming back to Varun, he and I have a lot of things in common. We talk straight, we are very fond of movies and talking nonsense - he is a big gossip monger and that has always provided us with enough fuel to keep going; and people somehow feel we are very old/ experienced who have all the answers, as most of our time goes in preaching others. Did I say we just love the attention? ;) We are never afraid to confront anyone when we know that we are right and the other person is wrong.Moreover, both of us had left our families and friends behind and come to a new place with the ambition of making a mark in the organization, and hoping to make some very good friends in the process.

Apart from that, he is very patient (a 'must have' if you are staying with me), a very good listener, very intelligent, and a true professional who strives to be the best at whatever he does. Thodee zyada tareef ho gayee kya? I think not, because whatever I have said is true. Do not let his school boy looks fool you... he has a vary matured head on his shoulders. To all that, add the fact that he is a good cook and you will find many girls going for his head (or heart).

There is no point in mentioning what we did together in the almost two years that we stayed together; we did practically everything together (now keep your dirty minds in check for I know where your mind is wandering). I say two years, because since April '07 we have had very less time to spend with each other as first I was deputed in Pune on assignment, then Varun left for UK and now when he is back in Mumbai, I am in UK. Now that he has decided to move back to Bangalore in pursuit of a better job opportunity, I wish him all the luck. I am sure he will do well there.

At this point let me name another close friend of mine whom I met in TechM - Mimi. Mimi and Varun together helped me in more ways than they probably realise. I have not thanked them enough. In fact, if my memory serves me right, I have never thanked them. So here is my chance.

Varun and Mimi,
The two of you have been fabulous friends, very understanding and caring. You were a pleasure to work with, to watch even the dumbest of movies with and share all those stupid jokes and ugly secrets with. You were very patient with me in probably one of the worst phases of my life, the time when I needed my friends from college the most - those who were the closest to me and who knew me inside out. But you accepted everything without asking any questions and it was because of your support that I was able to come out of it and never missed Joy, Yash and Arnab. So... thank you... thank you for being there; and sorry if I have ever hurt you. I might have been harsh/ rude sometimes, might have said many things, but the truth is that I cherish your friendship as much as I cherish anything in this world.

Chacha,
Please do not feel left out as you are not going anywhere. There will be time and then I will sing your praise too.

Lord Alfred Tennyson had once said, "The old order changeth, giving way to the new." How true this has been for me... my old friends went away and I met Varun. Now that he is going, I hope I make some more close friends. Not that they will ever replace him, but will certainly help me to care and share more and make me a better person.

I shiver at the thought of how the office would feel like without Varun and Mimi once I go back to India. It would be very similar to the feeling I had when he was in UK and Mimi had just left TechM. But it was a very short period and I had the excitement of my impending UK trip to keep me occupied. But then, God would have certainly planned something for me, but I will miss them for sure. The thought weakens me, but then the follwoing lines come to my mind:

I hold it true, whate'er befall;

I feel it when I sorrow most;

'Tis better to have loved and lost

Than never to have loved at all.

Moreover, I am not losing anything here... a friend is only going away for his good and when I say away, it is only to a different city. So, Au Revoir friend! People use this term to say goodbye. But au means 'till the' and revoir means 'meeting again'. So goodbye till we meet again... and we will meet soon - that's a promise.


Friend 4ever
-CK-

The Great Indian (read Marathi) Political Tamasha

Hello Ladies and Gentlemen! Yes I am back. You would be wondering what had happened to me. Nothing really. That's right - nothing much was happening which would have inspired me to write. Well I did come to the UK, but then that feeling is very personal and there was no point writing that down. But then, while I was in a bliss being back home after four months and eager to get together with my mates, my brothers during Yash's wedding, one Mr. Raj Thackrey decided that he had had enough time away from the public attention and needed to do something desperately to make people realize that he is still part of the political foray in Maharashtra; and what better way to do it than pick the agenda that his mentor, his hero (read Bal Thackrey) has persued since the inception of his political party.

Much has been said and written about what had transpired, and I am not going to tread that path. However, I have been wondering since the day the news first appeared why Raj had to raise a finger at a certain Mr. Bachchan about his contribution to Maharashtra. Did he forget that Mr. Bachchan had migrated to Mumbai when Raj's mother used to change his dipers? Does being born in Mumbai make someone a better Mumbaite than someone who has lived a better part of his life in that city - or for that matter any city? Why has Mr. Bachchan have to prove to anyone that he has done more for Maharashtra than for UP? For that matter why doesn't Raj say what he has done for Mumbai and Maharashtra. I bet his list would only consist of damage to public property, loss of money for the industry and also loss of life. He has cost the state so much only in these few days that probably all his positive contributions (if any) would have been nullified. His only contribution to the state is a feeling of hatred and unrest. The self-proclaimed messiah of the 'Marathi Manus' has only misguided the innocent public.

I sincerely feel that Mr. Raj Thackrey cannot handle competition and that is why he takes shortcuts. He was the favourite of his mentor, and that is why he aspired to be the leader of Shiv Sena someday when his uncle would decide to hang his boots. But then Bala Saheb's son came to the fore and Bala Saheb decided to pass on the baton to Udhav. Rather than staying with the party and competing with Udhav for the party supremo's post, he chose the shortcut of making a separate party of his own. Political pundits have always said that parties are made and guided by ideologies. So, when the ideologies of MNS and Shiv Sena are the same - to represent and fight for the 'Marathi Manus' - why was the need of another party. The only reason why Raj needed a new party was becase he wanted to be a supremo of some party; after all there is no chance of coming second when you are the only one in the race. Now, in the game of political one-upmanship with Udhav, he again chose to take a shortcut - to attack migrants who have been working in Maharashtra for years now - to gain some publicity and popularity. Don't they say that no publicity is bad publicity? After all who would take up the road of winning the hearts of people by working at the grassroot level. It would take years for him to get to the throne that way and an impatient and ambitious person like Raj would not be able to wait for that long.

Thinking from Raj's point of view, doesn't Udhav have an unfair advantage of leading a party which has a very good setup and reach at the grassroot level, which was also because of Raj to a large extent while he was in Shiv Sena? So why am I calling him the villian if he is trying to find a quicker way of rising high in life? The answer is that there is nothing wrong in trying to prosper and rise higher in life. In fact that is precisely my argument for migrants. My only problem is that he is trying to rise by steping on the lives of innocent and poor people - both migrants as well as the aborigines. The country and the law of the land empowers every individual to travel freely and earn a living in any part of the country. Opportunities are like the cubes of sugar to which one and all get attracted like flies. For some that opportunity could be the thrown of a state or the country, for some it could be the opportunity of earning their daily bread and giving a decent life to their families. The Constitution of India empowers any citizen to choose a place where he wants to live, earn or even contest elections from (otherwise how could Sonia Gandhi contest elections from Bellary).


I agree that resources are limited and the ever increasing number of migrants is taxing them even more, but intimidating people by abusing them, beating them up, forcing them to leave the city is not the solution to the problem. But the question that needs to be asked is if we really want to solve the problem. We, the citizens, might but the politicians certainly don't. They are only interested in making issues out of problems and use them as agenda to achieve political gains. One problem less would mean one less issue to encash on and political parties cannot afford that. Petty party politics takes over the common good of the people. Governance for our leaders means to gain power power and do good for themselves than to use that power for the development of people and the country.


It is only because of this selfishness that one Raj Thackrey could hold the government at ransom and challenge them to arrest him. This is the only reason why government has not been able to check events like Nandigram and now Nashik. The miscreants have looted, damaged public property, killed innocent people and are still walking free. The leaders misguide the youth of today, incite people to fight against each other and still manage to breath in the free air. The governments and those that run them are spineless because retaining the chair is more important than using the position correctly. Every political party is playing to the gallery, to their vote banks.


Having said all this, let me not only talk about the problem, but also try and analyse what is the solution. As I said earlier, sending migrants back to their home states in a rush is not going to solve the problem. On the contrary, it would cause fresh problems, as has happened in Nashik with around 40% of the mill workers not reporting for duty, mill owners and even companies like Mahindra and Mahindra, Mico and Glaxo Smithkline have incurred heavy loses. We would all agree that major cities are already burdened with their current population and something has to be done to stop this influx of migrants into the cities from various parts of the country. But this will not happen overnight. There needs to be a sustained effort from the government, the industries and the public to resolve this issue. The government, on its part, will have to provide the necessary infrastructure and security. The industry will have to show an inclination to set up base in the lesser known areas. On the part of the public, once the former two are taken care of this is not going to be a problem. A person decides to migrate only when he does not get proper means of livelihood in a place where he has grown up. No body wants to stay away from home, parents, family, but the quest for a better livelihood takes them thousands of miles away from home. So if they are given a better life close to home or at home at least, they would never migrate.

My prayers go out to those who have incurred personal losses in this political harakiri and to the nation so that it's citizens come to senses, or else people like me, who were born and brought up in Bihar, educated in Jharkhand and West Bengal, worked in Maharashtra, whose father (an IOCL employee) is currently posted in Haryana and who himself is posted in the UK, will have no where to go in his own country, the country which he calls his motherland.

Amen.

-CK-

Was it worth it?

Hello All! I know it has been long since my last post, but believe it or not I have been really occupied. I have been trying to publish this one for a long time now, and I am doing it finally. But begore I start, a few acknowledgements - The title is taken from Varun's blog and I have decide to complete this today (finally) after reading Akshat's post. Now the story:

This episode that I am going to write about started when I was in Panipath, visiting my parents on a two week long vacation. One fine morning, while I was still in Panipath, my SPM called me and asked me if I would like to work for the project that he has recently undertaken from Pune as a lead and I said yes because it would be something new and I was more or less fed up with the same kind of work in my project. But, then I didn't know what was in store for me.

I joined Mumbai office on 12th March and went to Pune the very next day. From the day I joined it was a battle, a full scale war in the team - war against delivery managers, testing teams; war to defend the project and the team members. Needles to say that the project was in shambles. There were faults galore, coming from everywhere - from SIT, E2E, LIVE. The first instruction that I got from my SPM when I reached Pune was, "I don't need you to get involved technically, but to act as the point of contact for E2E and live faults. I have people to work behind the scene. I need someone who can front-end them, who can talk to people and track things." I thought, "Am I meant for such things - afer all I have been coding for the last 18 months? Nevertheless, it is going to be a challenge, a new one." And, I nodded to express my acceptance.

Later in the day, I got the first tracker sheet which I had to update, and it blew my mind. I couldn't believe the number of faults pending with the developers, and I didn't know what to do with the sheet immediately. But, the quick learner that I am, I got the hang of faults and the sheet in a couple of days. Reaching office by 9 am and leaving not before 10 pm was the order of the day, and I had lost myself in the work. I barely had time to think. By the time I reached my accomodation, I used to be so tired, I used to drop dead on my bed wishing I wouldn't wake up the next morning. Weekends and Weekends lost their meaning, as we were working 7 days a week to catch up with the faults and deadlines.

After three weeks we managed to bring some respectability to the situation, but much was still left to be done. In the next week we were in a much better position, ready to take the next release to Live having fixed most of the faults. During the one month I had attended calls and meetings with my GH/ SPM/ TLs, I had shone a stupid SIT representative her rightful place (in fact she stopped coming to calls after that treatment), and received much appreaciation and encouragement from my SPM and team members alike. My biggest achievement during that month was getting rid of the Delivery Manager. He was just so stupid. One day he pulled me on a call with a BT guy, 15 years experienced and I was there trying to explain the technicallity of things, when I had never looked into the code. And the funniest part is that I sounded so convincing that even I was surprised.

Finally that call ended at 11:00 pm in the night and I was tired to the core. I couldn't believe how I managed to survive that call. But there also I learnt something. There was a guy who was over 15yrs experienced. I was nothing but a kid in front of him. But I was able to convince him more because of my confidence. Not that I was talking rubbish, but it could never have been technically perfect. But what impressed me most was that man's penchant to learn. He kept telling me, 'Please forgive my ignorance, but...' and kept shooting questions at me. He was determined to learn the entire functionality in one night. He budged only when I told him it was very late offshore. On my way back home, I was thinking how we are afraid to ask questions thinking what the other person would think about us, and we keep quite even when we might not have understood one thing on a subject. And there was a guy, who was so senior and had no qualms about asking questions even at the risk of sounding stupid. Actually it is much better to sound stupid that way than when you goof up. Then you might look for cover but you would have none.

One month passed and I returned to Mumbai only to go back to Pune in the last week of April. That was the time when appraisals were the hottest thing. PRDs were on in full swing. I had been so busy working, I barely managed to fill in my appraisal in time. When I returned to Pune, I told my SPM very clearly that i was not happy with my PRD and the ratings that I had got, and he told me not to worry. I got back to work. That was the time when our next release had gone on Production and now we were fixing Live Faults on war footing and perparing for the next release as well.

That was the time when dear Mr. Al-Noor Ramji (CEO, BT Design) announced a 'Code Red' in the entire Billing and Payments Programme' and Milan Gupta was appointed as the Code Red Manager. Needless to say, we were doomed - doomed to be available 24*7 to fix faults, at times stay in office for 3 days at a strech, doomed to stay in the same clothing (underwears inlcuded) for a couple of days, doomed to stink like... like... I don't know what. Those 2 weeks were terrible. But then again it was time for self realization. I realized that my body could take so much abuse. Things got a little better after that, but we were still working 16 hrs a day.

Burn out was inevitable, and my SPM was the first casualty. He sufferd slip disc and was bed ridden for 2 weeks. I fell ill for a couple of days and then decided to take things slowly. i started working more intelligently. There was a guy who had to go on leave for some family function but his leave was cancelled, and he wept in office. The morale of the entire team was on an all time low. I don't know what crept into me and I stood for that guy and confronted another manager (gap-filling for my bed-ridden SPM). I took the onus on me to get the job done so that poor guy could go to his family. And we did it really well.

I finally left the project in the end of June, when things were much better and another release was in the pipeline, having made a lot of friends. Back from there a thought crept into my mind whether all that effort was really worth it. Well here is what I thought:
1) I learnt how it feels to be in the line of fire - being the Single Point of Contact for E2E and Live faults, front-ending my team.
2) I had to lead a team which was very low on morale and experience. I had to be their friend, but had to get the work done at the same time. I dare say, I did fairly well there. I got an insight into the human psyche.
3) I realised that the root of the entire mess was a huge communication gap within the team and spineless leadership and improper planning - in fact there was no planning. If a project is in shambles, it is the manager who should be punished and not the team members. Due to a couple of incompetent managers, 20 people had lost there peace for over 6 months. The Business guys had promised the moon to the client and the team was racing against time to deliver an impossible task, and the managers did nothing to defend or to shield them.
4) I realised how important it is to ask the right questions. If you ask the right questions, you will never go wrong.
5) I got more insight into business and how Tech Mahindra works in those three months than i had in the 20 months before that. I met people while I stayed in the guest house and thus helped me network which is so important today.
6) Above all, I managed to secure an 'Outstanding' rating in my appraisals and got an above expectation increment. Did somebody say, "Sweet are the uses of adversity."

Well, dear readers, I leave the question to you - Was it really worth it?

Cheers,
-CK-